Sunny Holiday

 

 

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Great! I've kept my promise, that is, using English to write my blog. However, what's the meanings for? For improving English, I don't think my English is better now. For security issue, but actually no one visit my blog. ( Ha!) So, what's the purpose that I stick to it? Maybe I'm just fooling myself!! (Oops~ someone just come in the office and borrow the calculator from me.) Well, no matter what I did, now all break into pieces... I'm going to write in Chines anyway, but maybe I don't have time to do it. Or, postponed with some stupid reason, for example, my slowly typing in Chinese drives me crazy. My life goes so empty as usual, but fortunately I have good friends and families..., my father is healthier now, but he is still trying very hard to push me getting marry ASAP. I hope he can give up and set me free...I don't really like someone to control me, even my father.

People said "Extreme pleasure is followed by sorrow". Therefore, a strange feeling is inside my heart, and I can't tell what it is. I just wonder how long will the feeling last? Is the stange feeling so-called fear?

 

Temporarily, I have a feeling wanna kill somebody. It has been a long time that I haven't felt so explosive. Maybe I just can't get used to that some people are selfish. If I let it out of my mind, definitely, it's not a big problem. However, I still have a long way to be a Miss independently.  

 

Swimming in a lake, and strangely I thought of you.

Cause, in that summer, you saved me when I lost myself.

I've been thinking the matter about "regret" recently.

 

Understand. What a good word! "Under" and "stand" could make a story to tell how my life goes on. Let me explain why I said so. Lately, I found my EX-bf falls in love with a girl that I don't like (it was a long story, though.), I realize that there is nothing between us anymore. Our life is just moving on under the table. We don't need to communicate with each other, but we've already known that we've never and ever had any chance to get together. However, in the meantime, I finally can stand the fact, all by myself.  Lonely no more, because my heart belongs to no one but myself. I can do what I want without any interruption and concern. Maybe looks like I might be alone, but I'd be better off every day. Now, I understand, and you? (Are you curious again what I understand? ) 

Everything could be changable. You change your attitude, and then you change mine too. I thought I never change my feelings of loving you, but I was so wrong. Maybe I was just too afraid that I didn't love you anymore, so that I keep telling myself that I can't let it go. The truth is both of us fed up with this relationship. I believe change will make things better. I wish you will find your happiness, and I will too. It's time to change myself.